While I was on Twitter yesterday I came across a GREAT website called Math for Grownups (www.MathForGrownups.com) written by Laura Laing.  I’ve heard so many clients say during our planning discussions that they are ‘hopeless’ with math so they are sure they either won’t make the right decision or will never understand financial planning.  My basic premise has always been that financial planning isn’t about math to begin with, but also that any numerical decisions that need to be made are perfectly manageable by anyone – male or female.  Now I’ve found a wonderful resource to help everyone gain confidence and knowledge in this area.  Check out her ‘Manifesto’ (copied here) and PLEASE visit the site directly!

The Math for Grownups Manifesto

1. The “math gene” does not exist.

2. Everyone does math, every day. (Math is not just for scientists or mathematicians.)

3. Girls are great at math. (Boys, too!)

4. There’s more than one way to skin a math problem.

5. Math anxiety is real and detrimental—but it can be overcome.

6. Kids learn math best when they are allowed to discover their own approaches—and fail.

7. Math is not a competition.

8. Estimation is one of the most powerful math tools.

9. Math is about concepts, not right answers.

10. You can do math, promise.

 

It seems in our society that being “overbooked” has become synonymous with being an important, valued individual.  So we rush from children to work to errands to housework to volunteer time to renovations to social time with hardly a chance to breathe or think.  If we can’t return phone calls or emails or respond fully to customers, then it’s just another sign that we’re really handling the other more important stuff in life – other people will just HAVE to understand.

 While there’s no doubt that some days are quite hectic or turned upside down by real emergencies, maybe we’re really fooling ourselves about the important parts of life if we’re always focusing on our “TO DO List” instead of our “WE VALUE List”? 

 When we take the time to figure out what our values are, how we want to contribute to the world, what principles are most important to us, and how we want to tap into our best strengths, then we have our own platform available to help us make choices about what we do each day and how we do it.

 For example, you want to take your kids to their extra-curricular activity because you think it will be fun for them and/or help them learn new skills.  But, because you’re still fuming over a colleague’s response at work, you’re also now upset at having to drive in afternoon traffic and end up arguing with the kids all the way to the activity and then all the way through dinner and the evening afterwards.

 What if we had decided it’s a critical part of our lives to be more “in the moment” and we then focus on how great it is the kids are healthy enough to participate and we really want to use the time together to build more family memories?

 Or, while you’re working on a project deadline that is rapidly approaching you decide it’s also imperative to answer the phone anyway when it rings.  On the other end is a friend who is getting back to you about getting together the following day.  You are so stressed and upset about the project that you bluntly tell them that you’re stuck in this important project and you don’t have time to deal with them today.

 Unfortunately, what you’ve now accomplished is putting a major dent in your friendship and making it clear that your friend’s time is less valuable than yours.  What if we had already decided that our friends and family were top priorities for us, and so instead reacted by either 1) NOT answering the phone unless we were prepared to respond with civility to the caller, or 2) taking the 30 seconds necessary to thank our friend for calling, make some plans, or set a time to talk later in the evening?

 Because it takes some upfront time (and some ongoing reminders) to think about what we really need in life and what we think our purpose is, it often seems much easier to just “go with the flow” or “wing it” with whatever comes at us.

 But, if we’re usually being reactive, doesn’t that mean we’re also not making conscious choices and taking control over how our life turns out? 

 And if we feel out of control and stressed, how can this be good for the long term happiness and success we say we want?

Over the weekend I was watching a old family slide show about our camping trip to Alaska many years ago.  We traveled with another family who had been friends with my parents since their college days – so we used the titles of Aunt and Uncle to recognize that special relationship.  In some of those slides were pictures that included “Aunt Joan” and I recalled that many years ago, she shared with me her advice to use your best silverware every day.

Her thought on this was twofold: First, each day should be considered a special day and we should celebrate by using those items that help reinforce our conscious recognition of this idea. Second, those items that we label as “best” were often received as gifts or handed down by close family and friends, so using these tangible things can be warm reminders of their presence in our lives.
Maybe pulling out the entire silver set seems pretty impractical on those busy days as we rush in and out the door. But how about using the place settings for family dinners on the weekend – or pulling out one spoon to stir the morning coffee? Or perhaps selecting a special pottery mug to use for our morning beverage of choice…..and starting the day with appreciation for the gift giver?
We can also extend the same use to other items we usually tend to save for a special occasion and end up never using at all due to daily oversight – such as a silk scarf, neck tie, sweater, dress, jewelry, hat, or other accessory.
I believe Aunt Joan’s advice is a nudge to help remind me that we need to appreciate the everyday blessings we receive and to enjoy them in the moment……as we all know how quickly our good lives can be changed by both temporary and longer term events.

Whether your hopes for the New Year are related to finances, health, family, hobbies, or anything else, the first step is to make a conscious choice to move forward toward the benefit that you want.  Just the simple fact of stating your intention and getting excited about the possibilities will generate the first ripples of energy that will begin to carry you forward.  No need to focus on extensive “must do’s” or expectations of extensive change today……for the moment just let the idea germinate within you and take root inside.  Once you’ve made the internal commitment and recognize that you can indeed pursue what you need, then the actual follow-up will be infinitely easier and your success rate grows exponentially.  What’s on your radar to get excited about for this year?